stereotypes...
You might be a stereotype. You might be. You might be a hairy Italian dude wearing a wife-beater and a lot of gold chains over track pants. You might be. I don't know.
If you are a stereotype, of any kind, you don't have to go out of your way to be the mostest stereotype-y you can possibly be.
Coming in to work this morning, I ran into a long line of traffic. This was the kind of mystery traffic that appeared to have no cause. There was no accident, there wasn't even a guy changing out a tire on the side of the road which is usually interesting enough for people to slow down for.
There was nothing.
At least, it looked like there was nothing, until I ran into the stereotype.
He was driving a small Honda in the middle lane, at exactly 55 miles an hour, in a 65 mile per hour zone. On the left hand side of his rear bumper, there was a Phish sticker. On the right, LIVING GREEN. Traffic was forced to flow around him on both sides, effectively slowing everyone down.
When I got closer to him, I noticed that his back seat was crammed full of camping equipment. As I passed him, I saw him actually push a handful of granola into his unshaven face.
I expected him to throw a patculli-scented Birkenstock at me on my way by.
With his living green attitude, I'm sure he feels good about himself and the fact that his driving 55 at all times is gaining him 15mpg or so. I wonder if anywhere in his head is the miles of ripple effect stop and go traffic he has caused behind him, which probably offset his mpg benefit by 100s of times.
Stereotypes are bad for the environment.
3 comments:
for some reason this quote "I expected him to throw a patculli-scented Birkenstock at me on my way by." almost made me spit my wine onto the keyboard... luckily that did not happen...
That is why there are drinking and computing laws.
Perhaps you need an intervention.
Hey, what's wrong with a Honda? I drive a lovely black Honda Accord Tourer with lowered suspension, blue inside lights, sports kits, tainted windows, Sahara leather seats, yada yada... (it looks a bit like a hearse). Does that make me a stereotype 40+ that is having a midlife crisis? I am getting bald but try to compensate this with my divine body (some belly but tight bottoms). Another proof of midlife crisis? Looking at nice blondes but eating at home. Does that make me a stereotype male species?
I love model trains. Does that make me a stereotype adult that never grew up (toys and boys)? Typical family: man, wife, son and daughter, 20 years married (boring???).
Eating at MacDonalds with the kids (we don't have dunkin' Donuts in the Netherlands), and lovin' it...
Watching English detective series on Saturday evening with a glass of Scotch (no ice please!!!) and rice crisps (I do have to mind my tight bottom!!). Boring!!!
Oh my God, I am a stereotype all the way...
Ok, I do like to speed (the car does 140 mph), not in Holland, but there is no speed limit in Germany, only 40 miles from where I live (yiihaaaaahhh). This is so stereotype male (Men and Motors).
sigh....
dikkiedik
oh, by the way, I HATE camping. It's so basic. When I go on holidays I don't want to walk for a mile to have my daily dump (toilet paper under my arm). Everybody is wearing sandals (HELP!!). When you cook, everything tastes like plastic, no dish washers, only cold water, bloody midgets, after spending two days in the wildernis everything smells weird, especially on places that require regular cleaning.. You have to sleep on the cold floor, bad matras, it's either freezing or humidly hot (what's wrong with sleeping on a Hastens bed).
ehhh, I don't think I am a fan of camping.
Post a Comment